Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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