But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
