I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
