first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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