I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
