it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
