I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
