I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
