3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Randomize
