More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
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