Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
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