Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
