I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Just pee around me
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
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