How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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