i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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