The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
