Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I just cut my nipple shaving
apparently the secret to your success is patron
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
