You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
