Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I'm sobbing to NWA
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
