Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
