So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
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