It's Friday. Sex?
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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