I cannot find my penis.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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