Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
