I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
