That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
