i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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