Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
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