sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
