oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
