He kissed a someone with a penis
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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