Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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