But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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