We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
He? As in you personified your dick?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
