I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
