hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize