fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
