This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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