whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
so that wasnt chicken after all
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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