do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
