he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Randomize
