The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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