Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
