I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
