u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
