You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize