For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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