Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
