I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Oh god it's open bar.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
