that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
